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Mentor, Mentor, Who's Got A Mentor?

Who's Got A Mentor
If you've played sports, you have undoubtedly had a coach. But, what about not in sports? Have you had someone give you great advice not just from time to time, but for years? Well guess what? You had a mentor!

If you caught my blog about coaching last week, you'll know exactly where I'm going with this. Let's talk about how someone you value has been helping you and much more than just a coach. 

My Pops
This might sound familiar, but my dad has always been my mentor. If you have kids, you'll get the idea pretty quickly. The relationship between a father and a son or a mother and a daughter, or really any parental figure and the child is different than any other relationship. Some might even say it isn't mentoring when the people are that close to each other, but I disagree. 

While most children live with their parents until they're around 18 years old, there comes a time when the children become adults and move away. You may have experienced exactly what I'm talking about with your parents or maybe even a big brother or sister. But as we age, we start to think differently and sometimes we think we know it all. Yet, through all of these life experiences, your mom, dad, brother, sister, grandparents or friends were there for you. My dad was that person. 

After high school, I moved away from my dad and went to college. I would always make sure to call him once a week, typically on Wednesdays and many of those phone calls were mentoring opportunities. I'm sure some of those calls were attempts by my dad to make sure I was still alive and hadn't found my way to the hospital. During college and even afterwards, my dad continued to provide lasting advice that I still remember (at least some of it) to this day. There have been a lot of people in my life that I might consider a mentor, but the number one will always be the person who started mentoring me when I was wearing Huggies.  
Find a Mentor
Step one in finding a mentor is to look in your phone! You probably already have a mentor and you just don't know it! Well, that might be a stretch. But really, look in your phone. Who is the person you talk to most? Do you call, text, email, send smoke signals or in some way communicate with a lot? This person might be a mentor, but let's find out if that is actually the case through an experience I had mentoring someone. 

After I had graduated college, I joined the alumni association at my alma mater. Soon enough, I was elected to the board of directors for the alumni association and had many fun and rewarding experiences coaching students. There was one student named Josh that was of particular interest and he became my protege. Josh was an outgoing, smart and fun guy. He had a lot of things going for him, but he felt like something was missing. He really didn't know what he wanted to do at college, except for party. Josh and I struck up a conversation one day after meeting at an event and it turned into great mentorship. As weeks turned into months, Josh and I were talking a lot and meeting up on campus for events the alumni association was sponsoring. Josh asked a lot of questions and I happily gave him a lot of answers. Sometimes he didn't like what I was telling him, but I could tell it made sense to him. Those months turned into years, many years and now Josh, who lives in The Netherlands still turns to me for advice. 

Mentoring And The Lasting Impression

The feeling I get when donating money at church, helping my children do their homework, volunteering in my city and talking with Josh on the phone are all very different. The time I've spent helping Josh understand the big picture of life and to stop sweating the small stuff is sometimes a lot more rewarding than any of the other examples I've listed. I feel like I've given someone the opportunity to see color for the first time in their lives and it isn't through rose colored glasses. Mentoring has made a lasting impression on me. Now, who is out there looking for you? 
Marques Thomey
September 17, 2019

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